Tuesday, 10 March 2009


I'm a bad dog owner.

I've taken Jerk to Margate several times. She loves it. If I'm going away for any length of time my friends Karen and Bec always offer to look after her for me and it's fantastic for Jerk. She gets fussed over totally by the two of them plus their four other dogs. She's properly part of a pack here. At home, she doesn't really like other dogs. Always ignoring them, growling at them, biting their tails or, in one case, landing them in hospital. But she loves the four dogs she visits in Margate. She knew two of them pretty much since I got her, they used to live in Lewisham. I knew she loved coming here because Karen and Becs have told me so often about what a good time she has. The thing is, I've never really seen it before. Until yesterday.

Jerk and I walked along the cliff top towards the beach to see her pack. It's best for dogs to get reaquainted outside in case one of them just decides that they don't like the other and they start trying to smash each others faces in. As we walked along the cliff, I could see the pack on the beach below. We were very far away from them but it didn't stop the dogs from all looking up at once and Jerk to start pulling on the lead to get to them. Dog's noses and memory's are amazing. As soon as Jerk got to the pack it was like she was always with them. Immediately, she just looked...happier. That put me in a foul mood. The ungrateful fucking bitch.

At Karen and Bec's house Jerk has a sofa. She walks in, claims it and lies there for as long as she likes. Dogs come and go round the house all the time and Jerk is so visibly relaxed about everything. In my house, if I scratch my balls or pick my nose or sigh when I put the TV on, Jerk just assumes something important is happening and wants to be part of it. This mainly includes her standing on me and sticking her face in my eye. But in Margate there is constantly something fun for dogs happening and because it's constant she can relax knowing that when she's ready she can join in or start the fun.

This means that tomorrow when I take her home I will feel like shit. It's not like she's not happy in my house it's just she definitely is happier here. But then, so am I and I have to go back so, you know, fuck her.

Yeah, it's fair to say that I'm fed up today. I shouldn't be. I'm in a good place with good friends but Jerk's happiness is sort of fully on my mind. Plus, just before going to bed I started reading about the killings in Northern Ireland. That was not good bedtime reading.

Jokes about people on TV being cunts will return tomorrow.

1 comment:

Sophie said...

When you say dog do you mean dog, dog or dog?

Am I to assume that all this time Jerk is your unattractive missus? (It was the margate reference that confused me)

Sophie x