Wednesday, 23 December 2009


I have just done the most pathetic thing that I have ever done in my life. That's up against some stiff competition, I'm sure you realise. I've done many, many pathetic things in my life. As I write I'm sitting with a Spongebob Squarepants blanket over my shoulders and listening to an awful Morrissey B-Sides album. I mean, that's pathetic but that's nothing to what just happened. It really just happened 15 minutes ago.

Jerk is spending Christmas in Margate. I walked with her, Muki and a ball-launcher (it's a stick that throws tennis balls about 50 yards for dogs to chase) to the train station via the park. I threw the ball a lot and Jerk chased it, making sure she had a good run before getting on the train. They got on the train and I waved goodbye and walked home via the park. I still had the ball-launcher with me and as I walked threw the park habit got a hold of me.

I threw the ball. On my own. In the snow. While people walked past.

If you've ever seen anything more pathetic than a man throwing a ball for a dog that's not there and then walk through the wet snow to go and pick it up please let me know. I need to feel a bit better about myself.


Ian Hewett said...


Here's a picture of Cro Magnon Justin Lee Collins to cheer you up:

wllmtnnnt said...

I have found myself rating the cartoon characters my 2 year old watches in terms of fuck-ability. Is that worse? Not even 3D characters either. My number one was mummy pig.