Saturday 1 January 2011

The Best.

But let’s start 2011 with a positive. Let’s not just assume that everyone’s going to be rude and/or take the piss constantly. It’s a new year, a fresh start, a clean slate. Let’s look upon it positively.

Before 8.30 this morning I had told a cab driver off for ripping me off (he got embarrassed and admitted it) and asked a guy that worked at the airport café how he justified charging £1.18 for one single fucking hash brown (he later brought two more hash browns over to my table. TWO FREE HASH BROWNS!). Complaining has come so naturally to me already this year. I’m finally good at something and it’s paying off (TWO FREE HASH BROWNS!!).

But, of course, that’s not what anyone wants to read in the first blog of the year. No. You want to know what all my bestest’s of 2010 are and my ego is eager to tell you. Even apart from performing and “writing” Pointless Anger Righteous Ire, playing the title role of Vicar in Gutted: A Revenger’s Musical, having a big foot and touching Jim Bob, I have had a brilliant year full of bestest’s. And here they are:

BEST SONG:
Sugar Baby Spangle Puke by The Tender Genocide.

BEST ALBUM:
Fuck Off, Mum by Pixie Goulding.

BEST FILM:
The Man Who Knew 2 Unlimited.

BEST BOOK:
How I Escaped My Certain Fate by Jim Davidson.

BEST TV SHOW:
Big House Full of Cunts.

BEST DAYTIME TV SHOW:
Frankie Boyle’s Tramadol Lunch.

BEST CATCHPHRASE:
“That doesn’t taste like Twix, Nana”.

BEST RINGTONE:
Oh, yours. It’s hilarious.

It’s been a wonderful year, hasn’t it? And here’s to a bright, beautiful 2011. It’s going to be great. What? The Morgana Show has been recommissioned? Sigh...

www.michaellegge.info

1 comment:

Blackout said...

Happy new year to you, sir.
Thank you for making me smile and laugh in 2010.